Top Ten Ways You Know You're a 1L...

[This is cross-posted to my MySpace blog]

10. When making plans with friends, you make sure you let them know that this is just a social promise.

9. You can't read a billboard, window sign, or other posted ad without analyzing it to see if it contains all required elements to make it an offer and not just an ad.

8. Your family members are very careful not to use words such as "promise," "duty," "cause," or "guilt" without first informing you that they are not being used as a "term of art."

7. You now need to stop in the middle of a sentence to take a breath.

6. You find yourself analyzing news stories about negligence or defamation to see if they have enough facts to meet all the required elements.

5. Your family members can name all the defenses to intentional torts.

4. Your kids/spouse/significant other can name the four ways to show malice exists in a homicide fact pattern.

3. Your spouse/significant other threatens to do one or more of the following before midterms and/or finals: disown you, sedate you, rent you a separate apartment/hotel room, or take an extended vacation without you.

2. You are no longer allowed to watch: NCIS, CIS, Law and Order, Cops, or any other show that features law or police work because you can refrain from commenting on how they get xyz wrong.

1. You begin every answer to a question with, "Well, it depends on the facts of the situation..."